


This Danger, This Gift

by Cali_se



Series: Beautiful ~ Dangerous ~ Perfect [3]
Category: Breaking Bad
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Morning After, Protective Walter White
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-27
Updated: 2019-11-27
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:14:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21582850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cali_se/pseuds/Cali_se
Summary: The morning after....
Relationships: Jesse Pinkman/Walter White
Series: Beautiful ~ Dangerous ~ Perfect [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1557226
Comments: 1
Kudos: 35





	This Danger, This Gift

**Author's Note:**

> Follows [Beautiful and Dangerous](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21453118.html#cutid1) and  
> [Perfect](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21456994.html#cutid1)

They arrived at Jesse's house the following morning to find it exactly how Jesse had left it. Walt had no reason to suppose the gang wouldn't be back in touch at some point in the near future, but he wasn't overly surprised when they failed to find them lurking in the shrubbery. He had a sneaky feeling they'd bide their time.

He'd woken up around six, and it had taken a moment to remember where he was, and another to realise the enormity of the situation: that he was in bed with his arms around another man - and that man was Jesse Pinkman, a warm and very naked Jesse Pinkman.

After the initial, mutual realisation that they had really gone _there_ , a quiet awkwardness had fallen between them, even when they'd stopped to eat a take out breakfast. It still hung in the air as they checked every corner of Jesse's house, and then followed them into the living room.

"Well... there ain't nobody here but us chickens," Walt said, attempting to break the tension with a breezy, encouraging smile. He sat down and laced his fingers in his lap, twirling his thumbs; his mind raced while his exterior presented a calm facade. 

Now changed into one of his own hoodies, Jesse sank down into a chair and lit up a cigarette. "So, are you sticking around?" he asked, the hope in his voice barely concealed, for all his attempts at nonchalance: _Yo, I don't give a fuck what you do, bitch._

"I have to go home," Walt said.

"Your wife's due back later, right?" 

Walt looked for the sting in the tail of Jesse's question, but there wasn't one. 

"Yes."

"Listen, I really don't wanna be the cause of shit hitting fans. I don't wanna be _that_ guy."

"It'll be okay, Jesse. I'll work it out," said Walt, although he wasn't entirely sure how. "Get some rest while I'm gone. I'll see what I can come up with regarding getting our money back. And the rest. Whatever happens, they won't get away with this."

Jesse sat forward and took another drag of his cigarette. "We don't know where they are."

"We'll find them."

"The car's probably long gone now. I think they stole it. They never told me where they came from. Just that they were moving in on us. Where do we even start, huh?"

"We'll find them."

Walt watched as Jesse smoked for the next few minutes, silent and deep in thought. His arms ached to hold him, and when their eyes met, that urge only increased. But now he had to inhabit his other life, his parallel universe. The bubble he'd created with Jesse in the motel would have to wait awhile. He needed to manage things... stop the shit hitting the fan, to use Jesse's words.

They held one another's gaze until Walt deliberately broke the contact. "I'll call you later, Jesse, as soon as I can. Are you going to see me out?" he said.

Jesse nodded as he extinguished his cigarette. As he got up, he winced as the pain in his shoulder caught him. 

"Maybe you should get that looked at by a doctor," Walt suggested. "If it's still sore."

"I landed on it pretty hard when that bitch shoved me out of the car like last week's trash."

"He'll pay, don't you worry. They don't have the monopoly on biding time..."

"Did last night mean something to you?" Jesse said suddenly, as if ripping off a band-aid, quickly, before he lost his nerve. "Because it meant something to me. I know I probably shouldn't have come on to you like that, kissing you... but you wanted it just as much as I did... right?"

Jesse was close to Walt now, almost touching him. Walt in turn moved nearer to Jesse, further closing the gap between them. It was a relief to both of them when they fell headlong into a deep and passionate kiss. They stumbled a little but held on to one another, letting the door steady them as they backed up against it. Walt let his hands wander into Jesse's hair, beneath his clothes. Memories of the night before came back as his fingertips brushed Jesse's belly. Tender, passionate, new... He found himself wondering when he was going to have that again, when he'd get another chance to hear Jesse moan his name, another chance to touch him, to hold him when he came...

As they parted for air, Walt cupped Jesse's face in his hands and pressed a single kiss against his lips. He sighed, and took Jesse into an embrace, felt Jesse's arms wrap around him in response, holding on tight.

"Yes, I wanted it too," he said. "But, Jesse, I have to go.”

***

Walt sensed Jesse watching from the window as he went outside and got into his car, but he didn't look up, just started the engine and made his way home, wondering how he was going to deal with this new situation - this danger he was in, this beautiful gift he'd been given that made him dizzy with longing, but also held the potential to destroy him. He knew one thing though: making love to Jesse had meant something that he couldn't put into words.

He was halfway into his journey when a strange feeling came over him, causing him to pull over in order to gather his thoughts. 

He picked up the sweater Jesse had borrowed and pressed it to his lips, breathing in the scent now imprinted in its fabric. He imagined Jesse at home: alone, nervous, smoking cigarette after cigarette - and maybe something else besides, to take away the anxiety. Their night together once again came flooding back: Jesse's body beneath him, the warmth, the desire, the trust...

_You should've stayed with him, Walt._

"I couldn't. I have to go home." 

_You have a few hours yet... and he needs you. It's your fault he got grabbed in the first place, you said so yourself. C'mon, do the right thing, huh?_

"I am. I'm going home."

_No going back, you said. But you went there anyway!_

"Dammit, I know!" 

_He needs you, Walt. He_ wants _you._

"And I want him." 

The sensation of being torn in two caused Walt actual pain as he sat at a metaphorical crossroads. His steel resolve appeared to be under dire threat of collapse. Was this regret? 

No. He couldn't regret it, no matter how hard he tried. And they'd been bound together before they'd spent the night in each other's arms; they were a team, business partners, and once again they were being threatened. He'd reassured Jesse that he'd be okay, that those punks wouldn't come back straightaway, or go to his house, but what if he was wrong? The unexpected had a habit of arriving unbidden these days. And any possibility that they were about to pay a house visit - however remote he thought that possibility to be - wasn't something he could happily ignore.

Unsure exactly which train of thought (or self-deception) was behind his decision, and not really caring either way, Walt started up the car, turned it around and made his way back to the beautiful, dangerous road.


End file.
